How To Stop Repeating The Same Mistakes and Change

Newsletter issue

Sent on 28th January 2023

Do you prefer to listen? here's the audio version:

Hey!

It's Bruna here, happy weekend!

In this week's issue, I will share one of the most intriguing self-reflection tools I use with my clients to help them capitalise on their learning experiences. It will help you make the most of all that has happened to you too, no doubt.

It will take you about 3 minutes, 54 seconds to read it, and you'll walk away with:

A guide to self-reflect on your 2022 learning experiences
A framework to give the brain what it needs to change
A well-crafted plan to change what you want to change

Enjoy!

As we’re well into the new year, it’s important to reflect on what we learned in 2022 to capitalise on those lessons and avoid repeating the same mistakes.

“You never make the same mistake twice. The second time you make it, it is no longer a mistake. It is a choice.” ~ Lauren Conrad

Change occurs when we follow a specific framework that leverages how the brain works. While self-awareness is key to identifying what we need to change, it won’t do much alone.

By knowing how the brain works, we know what processes we need to follow to turn our awareness into fuel for change.

What the brain needs in order to change is:

Awareness of what happens and what some events mean for us
The ability to observe our behaviour as objectively as possible to identify areas of growth
A clear picture of how we want to handle the same scenario in the future (this is the KEY step!)
A conscious declaration of what we’ll do differently as a result of such learning

It’s only when we engage with each step that we help the brain visualise a different future and create the neural pathways that will lead us there.

So the vital, often ignored, step here is to visualise how you will handle the same situation in the future thanks to what you’ve learned in that experience.

This tool has been designed specifically to help you quickly assess what happened in 2022, what you’ve learned through the key events that occurred, what you’d like to change and how you’re going to do it.

You can either use this tool or follow this framework on your notepad. When it comes to inner work, handwriting is always recommended, as it facilitates deeper processing. But we live in a fast-paced world so feel free to use the digital tool if you find it easier.

Screenshot of what the Excel tool looks like.

By filling out this tool, and reflecting on the key events that occurred each month, you'll be able to gain a better understanding of how the past year has affected you, how you've grown and how to avoid repeating the same mistakes.

Go back, reflect and identify the key events, both good and bad, and take note of what these events meant for you and how they impacted your life.

Next, take some time to reflect on where you think you did well and where you may have gone wrong. Consider what you learned from the good experiences and how you can apply that learning to future situations. Similarly, think about what you can do differently in the future to avoid repeating mistakes from the past.

By taking the time to reflect on the past 12 months and identifying key events, we can raise our self-awareness and live a more conscious life (what I call living like a Human Being vs Human Doing!). We can also use this information to make better decisions in the future and capitalise on personal growth.

This exercise has helped many of my clients reveal hidden lessons and shine a light on how they want to show up at work, at home and in the world in general without being trapped in their old, ineffective, automatic thinking. As always, the key to a fulfilling life lies in our self-awareness and this tool will help you raise it and keep you present.

Now, let's break that down into actionable steps:

Download a copy of this file.
Rethink 2022, month by month. Uncover the key events that happened in your life each month.
Reflect on their significance in the broader picture of your life.
Ask yourself how well you did there and what you’d do differently today.
Assess what you’ve learned and what output you want to bring with you in 2023.
Visualise the same scenario occurring again in 2023 and what concrete, different actions you would take.

My clients say this tool is incredibly useful for self-reflection and leads them towards real change. The reason lies in knowing how the brain works and what it needs to change: tangible information.

Wanting to change without taking the time to visualise what that change means and how to apply it is useless and frustrating.

The brain needs certainty, and taking the time to visualise the same scenario addressed differently helps you create the new neural pathways needed to behave differently. Miss this step, and the old mental habits will always take over.

I hope you find this tool as functional as they do, hit reply and let me know what you think? If you have any questions, feel free to ask. I love interacting with my readers and strive to respond within 48 hours.

See you in two weeks, same place, same time.

Have a fab weekend,

P.S. Who do you know that can benefit from it? Help them by sharing it!